It began, as most experiences, with a sense of well-being. Simply put, I felt good about myself. Relaxed. Peaceful. Accepting. Then, from the center of my solar plexus, began an inner vibration that I can only equate to purring. The vibration was increasing my feelings of well-being. It seemed to swell in me. It felt so good, I just let it come. I didn't try to think about it, or define or describe it. I just enjoyed it. The stronger it grew, the happier I became. Higher and higher and higher still, I felt like I could levitate if I wanted to, or even fly. I got so happy I was sure that I could just jump up and paste myself into the sky.  

In my mind's eye I could see a white light, an inner light. It started as a pinpoint, then suddenly, in a flash, it burst with rays - hundreds of them, reaching out in every direction. The higher and stronger the vibration, the more the light filled my field of vision, until there was nothing but the light. And the Light was Living. Filled with Life. Flowing with it. It was everywhere, covering everything. I lost all feelings of self-consciousness. I don't remember any thoughts, only being.  

When I close my eyes and re-call it (call it forth once more), here is how I describe it:  

More than joy. More than peace. More than prayers answered. More than dreams fulfilled. 

Enveloped by love, wrapped in its permanent bliss, you melt. You explode. You merge. You evaporate. You spring forth once more. You become more. Still you. Always you. But more. Sated. Supported. Embraced. Enjoyed. Beloved. You become the delight you give. You revel in the delight you receive.  

It Is Union.  

A dance as delicate as any flower petal, yet as deep as any canyon - it becomes the kiss that ends all yearnings and washes away all doubts and fills all the spaces within and around you. Love pleasing love. That which you are is pleased. That which you give is pleasing. And what you are, and what you give, and what you receive are all the same. Perfect Love. So perfect, It can't be spoken. But It can be experienced.  

It Is Reunion.  

Tenderness beyond human imagining, humor as sweet and embracing as a lover's gentle smile. Every thirst is quenched, and every memory of having thirsted erased, obliterated. And you feel that this, surely, is how all the universes, the realms, the everything must be created - in the Holy Instant when Love gives Itself to Itself and is received by Itself.  

Home.
Essence.
Love.
Lover.  

All the same. All one. Beyond want. Beyond desire. Beyond words. Beyond thoughts.  

Sweet surrender to that which you sought.
And have found.
And have become.
And always were.
And always will be.  

And here is Its Promise, Its Covenant:
Reach it even once and you have passed the point of no return. For now it is known. And you are the one who knows it. You may return to this earthly consciousness, and you may return to your daily activities and distractions, but always is it within you -- this (re) member (ing) of your sweet and glorious self, and the union of that glorious self with the sweet and glorious self of All That Is. And always, regardless how ego-tossed and confused or lost you may find yourself - just one thought -- one call -- one whisper of this member (ing) and you will find your way home. For now you understand that YOU are the beacon, the homing device, the heart that lives within the heart of Love. If you feel its absence, then you have merely turned your attention from it. But it is there. Waiting for your call. Waiting to answer that call. In an instant. Just One Holy Instant.    


* "Holy Instant" is a section in  A Course In Miracles.  This is merely my experience of that instant.


© Debra J Meyer

With a few minutes to myself, I slipped into a meditative state.  I began to fill up with the most delicious and satisfying peace.  I found myself standing in this golden/yellow light.  It seemed to me that I was standing in the sun, or in a star.  Somewhere.  Nowhere.  It didn't seem to matter.  It just was.  I could vaguely see a few other shapes within this sphere of light/flame.  They had no distinguishable features.  Just the outlines of form.  Yet these shapes seemed to move about freely, coming within my range of vision, moving on.  They were not only within the flame, the light.  They were the flame, the light.  I knew I was not alone, just as I knew I was as they were.  I was the light within the light.  I was the flame within the flame.  I felt at home, empowered.  Peacefully content.  No thoughts.  Just being.

I began to hear human voices, speaking simultaniously, though nothing like a confusing cocophany - just going about their business.  I could not see them, but I knew there was activity, there was civilization.  It was life on earth, and people were busy living their lives, making their decisions, asking internal questions, looking for guidance.  Yet they felt a long way off, that earth had somehow become some distant planet, far away, yet always within reach of the rays of this sun in which I stood. 

It was then I realized all the people were drawing from the light.  Unknowing, unaware that this they were doing.  Yet it all felt so right., so good.  So intended.  And I knew that the details and the circumstances of each and every life simply didn't matter.  Only the connection, only the flow was important.  I could feel how it sustained them, guided them, led them to a richer, more conscious experience.  I felt no compulsion to know the details. 
It became very clear to me at that point, that this is exactly as it should be.  That I was just to stand in the light and hold it so that others could draw from it.  And at that precise moment of understanding, I heard this voice that was everywhere/nowhere tell me exactly that:  "You are to stand in the light and hold it.  That is your only function now."

I still go about my daily business.  I still go to work, I still pay my bills.  I still have my own personal experiences.  Yet that thought is never very far from me.  It is my clarion call.  And whenever and wherever I feel the need, I take a moment to remember the light.  To recall the feeling.  And then I stand - opened - and hold the light so it may flow out into the ethers, or perhaps more accurately, through the collective, knowing it will go exactly where it is called.  I do not need to know its destination point.  I do not need to know why it is called, or how it will be applied.  Nor do I need to see the results.   That is not my domain.  I am just to stand in the light and hold it.  That is my only function now.

It is also my privilege.

Who I am, where I go, what I do is all irrelevant - momentary distractions of a fleeting experience.  What matters is the light.  The flame.  The eternal truth that lives, the eternal flame that burns within us all.   Me, you, we, they - momentary players in this game of "Trivial Pursuits."    A mere nanosecond of a vast eternity.  An eternity that is, I might add, shared by us all.  Right here.  Right now.  And I am very happy that this is so.

© Debra J Meyer

(A Love Letter)

Come to me
   my solace,
      my resting place.

Come sit with me
   my comfort,
      my joy.

Come be with me
   my food,
      my drink.

You are everything
and when I AM with you
I AM everything, too.

© Debra J Meyer

Humility is the awareness that every aspect of Life - be it thought, wind, stand, or stream, is held in the Mind of God with equal esteem.  It is the understanding that rock is as holy as man, that insect wings are equal to those of angels, that the flow of water is as important as the beat of a heart.  Humility is recognizing the peace that undeniable certainty brings, and the realization that this peace is your home.  It is the knowing that every moment and every being pulsates with such holiness you cannot help but honor this life of love that we share.  Humility is accepting that every life exists in God, and we are each expressions of love and truth, spirit and wisdom, movement and manifestation.  It is the dawning of the idea that it takes all of life, each and every particle, to comprise our Immaculate Self - for life is of God, with God, and in God.  There can be no exceptions.  To be humble is to know that whatever life may bring your way, or wherever you may find yourself, you are forever and always dwelling in the most incredible loveliness - the loveliness that IS the Mind of God.  Humility is bliss.

© Debra J Meyer

There are no separations where love exists.  There is only what we build together through our shared experience.  This love becomes the threads in the fabric of our unions.  It is the glue that holds us together.  Through time we create a line of communication that knows no boundaries.  We have seen glimpses of this here on earth, as we looked into each other's eyes and knew that the other heard what our heart and soul were saying.  We've felt in the tender touches that expressed so much more than words.  And we've tasted it through the challenges we have faced and overcome together.  This love has always made us stronger, not weaker.  It has brought us closer, not torn us apart.  It deepens us each as individuals.  It does not dissipate -- it cannot be rescinded by death, or anger, or fear, or regret.  It simply exists as we created it, moment by moment.  We do not need to see or touch it to know it is real and everlasting.  Love, then, becomes our passageway to those who have gone before us.  Think of them, and they are there.  Speak to them and they will hear.  Hold them in your thoughts and they shall always be within your reach.  Love is where we live.  Look there for those you thought you'd lost, and you will find them -- safe and whole and loving you.

© Debra J. Meyer

As I begin this part of my journey, I will try to remember the path I'm on is of my own choosing.  Destiny is in my hands.  Therefore I will be true to the rules I set forth for myself, remembering always that the "good life" is born of integrity; that shortcuts create peril and havoc; that success is not measured by money or things, but by the goodness I create, the beauty I share.  I will take the time to rest and be at peace with myself and all that surrounds me.  And I will never forget that my own contributions, both large and small, are valuable and necessary to the health and happiness of the world in which I live.

© Debra J Meyer

sur-ren-der:   the letting go of fear (if only for an instant)
                         so the joy of inspiration can light your way.

There can be no growth without change, no forward movement, no expansion of awareness, no freedom from the ravages of fear and guilt and pain. Change is one of life's fundamental miracles. It is a necessity to love's fulfillment and to God's Promise: "I will not leave you comfortless." Without change, we would have no protection from the weight of our own imaginings, no ascension of our own misunderstandings, no surrender from the cares and burdens of this world we have created for ourselves. Change is a gift of grace. It is an act of love for self and for others, and a release from all that stands between us and the truth we seek. A sister to Free Will, change is a perfect answer to an imperfect situation. And the only thing it requires of us is the willingness to embrace its healing and transformative powers. Thank you, oh Creator of All Life, for offering us not only a way out, but a way up. Our hope is realized in you.

© Debra J Meyer

Words can touch your heart but they cannot fill it.
They can move you, but they cannot love you.

Words can be beautiful, but beauty they cannot create.
They can describe what it is, but what it is, they cannot make.

To fill, to love, to create, or to make -- that's strictly up to us.
All the powers of "to be" or "not to be" are safely and securely within you and me.

© Debra J Meyer

The other day I was looking at the illusion of this "world."  I saw it as this vast canvas -- all mish-mashed with the color of people's thoughts.  Chaotic and commanding of our attention.  I thought to myself, "Where to start?" and "When to stop?"  It was like an unattended jungle of perception.  So I turned it over.  And saw this big blank space.  "Oh, yes," I said.  "This is much better."  Clean.  Clear.  Pure.  No misunderstandings.  No misperceptions.  No declarations of guilt or innocence.  No anger.  No pain.  No plots.  No subtexts.  No distractions.  No need for anything.  Not even a comfortable chair.  Free and uncluttered.  Exactly as created.  What a nice place to be.  I think I'll set up shop here, on the blank side of the canvas.  At least for awhile.

© Debra J Meyer

Step lightly into matter, don't let it weigh you down.
Balance is required if you are to wear the crown
of mastery of inner self, controlling lines of thought,
keeping you creatively in realms where you'll be taught ...

You truly are a child of God, living in the light,
free to use your powers with forethought, love and might
in perfect and true partnership with all the life within,
and when you can accept this love you are ready to begin ...

To take your rightful place in life, as you were born to do,
finally making manifest your heart's desire for you.
No mystery in mastery, no special games to play,
just living your life peacefully and fearlessly each day.

No more need for you to think you live your life alone.
No more looking outwardly for what will bring you home.
For in one tiny moment, you'll simply realize
that all your inner turmoil was born of senseless lies.

In truth you are an equal part in the universal scheme.
A perfectly appreciated aspect of God's dream.
No matter what another says, no matter what they do,
your life is guaranteed by God, it is God's gift to you.

So do not waste your time on lies, there's better work to do.
There is a world within this world that's waiting just for you.

© Debra J Meyer